Time has passed and you’re finally ready to go through the belongings left behind by someone who has died.  While some people may feel compelled to keep everything, and others simply want to get rid of anything that reminds them of their loss, the best course is probably somewhere in the middle.

Solicit the help of a close friend or family member.  (Too many people may make decision-making difficult.)  Be prepared to take your time, and to split the responsibility into many sessions if you need to.

You might find it easiest to go through everything the first time by placing items into three groups:  one group for items you plan to keep, one group for items you plan to give away, and, finally, one group for items you are unsure about, or not ready to make a decision about.  If your loved one has left a letter of instruction, or if dear friends or family members have a special connection to any particular item, this may assist you in assigning some items to a good home.

After your first sorting, place the “unsure” items into a box or boxes and store, then deliver the items in the “giveaway” group to the appropriate destination – other family members, or a charity.

At a future date – perhaps a month or two after your first sorting, go through the process again.  Reevaluate the items you have kept to see if you’ve changed your mind about any of them.  Take a look at your “unsure” pile and see which items can be sorted into “keep” or “giveaway.”

You may have to go through the process a few times before your “keep” pile has resolved itself into a manageable number of truly treasured items.  Allow yourself the time, and the help you may need, to finish this task at a pace that is  comfortable for you.